Moms' Weekend Away

Last weekend, I did something I've never done before. I went away - for one night - *without* the kids!!!

I'm friends with a bunch of local moms who have been doing this twice a year for a year or two, but I've never gone. Either I wasn't part of the group yet (or enough a part of it) or I wasn't able to, or I wasn't ready to. But. Now I met the criteria (although I took Saturday off of work to make it happen), and my parents were willing to take the kids, so I took advantage of it! 

I didn't realize how much I needed that kind of thing until I did it. It was AMAZING. So much fun! And quite educational, in more than one way! 

I actually spent two nights away from the kids, but the first night they were at my parents' house and I was at our house, in my own bed. The weekend was a two-night thing, but some people only went for one, and I'd decided I didn't want to drive down (about an hour and a half away) during rush hour on Friday, after working all day, and already be exhausted when I got there. So, I met my parents and kids at Tot Shabbat at our temple after work, but then went home afterward without the kids, and drove down with two other moms on Saturday morning. One of the moms from this group has a family member with a house on the cape that they let us use in the off-season.

When we arrived around 12:30, the women who were already there had just finished brunch, and we went for a walk on the beach. It was chilly, but not too cold, and I even took my shoes off so I could feel the sand on my feet. It was so nice. Eleven or twelve women, all moms but with no kids there, just walking, talking, climbing on the rocks on the jetty, looking for pretty shells. No kids to watch, chase, stop from eating sand. After the beach we stopped for some people to grab a quick bite, went to a couple of antique stores and a cute little general store, and then back to the house for a little while before going out to dinner. The restaurant wasn't the greatest, but the company was! 

Back at the house, we all settled into the living room to hang out, chat, and play games. This is when it got educational! First of all, there was a lot of talk about sex. I, of course, didn't have much to contribute, although I did tell a story from summer camp, loooong ago! But the conversation was mostly about sex in relation to being married, how often they have it, which type they prefer, things people have tried or not, whether or not they've ever considered swinging or polyamory, etc. I realized that I haven't had a sex talk with a bunch of women in so long that it's really a whole different conversation now. It was just very interesting hearing what they had to say. 

And then someone broke out the pot. While we were walking on the beach earlier, someone had mentioned that a few people had done it the night before, and I was intrigued. It had never even crossed my mind that a bunch of 30-40-something-year-old moms would use pot. I don't know why, I just never thought about it. There was alcohol, which didn't surprise me in the least, and most women were partaking in at least a small amount. I wasn't, because I've never been a drinker and honestly don't have any interest in it. But the pot surprised me, for some reason. Turns out, one of the mom's husband has a medical marijuana card, because medical use is legal here and he qualifies. But I guess he's able to get more than he actually needs. He'd offered for her to bring some, along with his vaporizer, on the trip. 

The first time I tried pot was shortly after college, I think, and it totally didn't work. I don't think I did it right. The second time was about 11-12 years ago, with my immediate family the weekend after Thanksgiving, and my dad and my brother taught me how to inhale. Long story! It worked, and I remember liking it.

So, yeah, I vaped pot last Saturday night. And you know what? It was A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!!!!! I mean, I loved it. It just felt so awesome. As soon as I started to feel it, I recognized the feeling from the last time I did it, even though it was so long ago. I remember I kind of zoned out, and really liked the way it felt, and kept thinking, "this is awesome, how long does this last, sssshhhhh, no, don't change the music to something faster, I like this mellow tune, how can I make this last longer", etc. It was the same this time, but even more intense (I think I did much more this time). It totally mellowed me out, it felt great, and it was just so nice to NOT CARE. And to not HAVE to care. About anything, really. 

So, I've been doing some reading/researching this past week, because I wanted to know exactly when it'll be possible to legally buy recreational marijuana here (supposedly July 2018). I've gotten quite the education! Apparently, there's a difference between being high and being stoned, and from what I've read, I was stoned out of my mind last Saturday night. I learned a new term from my research - couch-locked. I was absolutely, positively 100% couch-locked! I described it to someone the next day without knowing it was a thing - it was like my body was asleep but my mind was one step above sleep, and even though at one point I kind of wanted to get up and move somewhere quieter, I couldn't. I couldn't move. It sounds like a lot of people don't like being couch-liked, but I did. I just sat/lay there enjoying how I was feeling, and it kind of felt like I was further away from the rest of the people in the room than I was. I was totally in my own world, and liked it there! When someone talked to me, or everyone suddenly laughed really loudly, I didn't like it, because it brought me out of it, sort of lessened the good feeling, and I wanted to go back! I was aware of what was being said, and I even had something to add to the conversation at times, or realized I knew an answer to a question in a game they were playing, but I couldn't speak. And of course I didn't care! For a while, they were playing "Scene It", a game that uses a DVD. In between questions, there was a screen with a rectangle of moving lights, and I really liked those lights. I kept watching the lights light up around the rectangle and kind of zoned in (out?) to it. 

Anyway. It was so cool, and I keep joking that I totally missed my calling as a pothead. Ha! But maybe I'm having some sort of midlife crisis?!? Because I can. not. wait. to be able to use pot again. Don't get me wrong - I'm not going to do it daily or anything. And NEVER when I'm responsible for the kids. Only on nights when both of them sleep at my parents' house, which will probably be most Friday nights going forward. Jordyn already sleeps there most Friday nights, and now that Evan is one, he'll likely start to, also. Last weekend was the first time he slept over there without me being there, too, and the first time I've ever been away from him all night. 

The whole thing is so strange to me, because I've always been more or less of a goody-two-shoes. Never been drunk. Never taken a single drag on a cigarette. Only smoked pot twice before last weekend, and I'm almost 43! So it feels weird, but I feel like I've (finally) found my vice. Other than tv and chocolate, of course! Alcohol and cigarettes don't interest me, I have absolutely no desire to use them. But pot? I can't wait to get my hands on more!

I'm also looking forward to another moms weekend away in the spring. This same group goes to another location in the spring, a couple hours away. Another mom has a family member with a condo we can use. Now that I've gone away without the kids once, I'm sure I'll do it again. Pot aside, it was SO nice to get away and just get a true break from all things kid. Just for a while. While I easily could've stayed another night or two, and will try to go for two nights next time, it was also nice to come home and for them be so happy to see me!