The Great Preschool Search

In my area, the good center-based child care centers/preschools tend to have loooong waiting lists. As in, visit this summer, and get on the waiting list for NEXT September. People often get on multiple waiting lists for infant spots when they're newly pregnant. Often it costs $50 to $100, nonrefundable, just to get on a waiting list. It's crazy.

So when I decided I wanted to switch Jordyn from her home-based daycare to a center-based program, and hopefully sooner rather than later, I realized I better start looking right away. But then we were just about to move, and I realized there was no way I could handle it all at once. So I didn't start looking at places until about a month or so ago. I would have gotten her on waiting lists a long time ago, but at that point I didn't know where we'd be living in a year, so it was impossible to know where to look. Plus, at that point, I wasn't sure exactly when I was going to want to switch her.

I don't think I could honestly say I've been 100% happy with her current place (a home family daycare) since pretty much the beginning. First, it bothers me to no end that she doesn't have any books out for the kids during free play time. There are books, but they're high up on a shelf, and she'll take some out to read to the kids, but then they go back up on the shelf. Jordyn happens to LOVE to read books, and it would be great for her to be able to access books to "read" on her own during free play times. I mentioned it a couple of times towards the beginning, but nothing changed, and I even went so far as to bring in a bunch of books as a classroom gift when school started up after the holidays, and said something about how it would be great for them to be accessible to the kids. They were on a lower, but out-of-the-way shelf for a while, but then they disappeared onto the high shelf with all the rest of the books. Drives me batshit-crazy, because literacy is such a big thing, not to mention I feel as though she should have listened more to a parent request. Plus, what's the big deal with having a few books within the kids' reach??

Another issue is that I don't think they spend enough time outside. Jordyn started at the daycare in mid-November of last year, and I don't think she went outside from when she started until late spring/early summer. There were PLENTY of days in late fall and early spring when they could have put on jackets and gone outside. There were even some days this summer that were beautiful, gorgeous days that weren't too hot and low/no humidity - the days I really wished I hadn't had to go to work - that they didn't go outside. WTF? Jordyn loves to be/play outside, and in Boston, you really have to make the most of the time when you can go outside, because of how bad the winter can be. Although I know many schools (including the one she's currently transitioning to, but I'll get to that) that go outside as long as the temperature is 20+ degrees, including wind chill, and as long as it's not pouring or a blizzard. I honestly think the head teacher is just lazy. She's been doing this a long time, and while I think she still loves having the kids around, she seems to be taking the easy way out these days.

The teacher is also really unprofessional, in that she's constantly telling me about her woes, being so busy, complaining about her in-laws and their medical problems, how her husband doesn't help as much as he should, about her and her daughter's (who's the assistant teacher 3 days/week) medical issues, etc. Sometimes I have a question about how the day went, or want to fill her in on things like that Jordyn had a rough night, etc., and I can barely get a word in about these relevant things because she doesn't stop talking about random stuff.

In the packet of information I was given when Jordyn first started, it described their discipline policy, which says they do a lot of redirection, occasional time outs for bigger stuff no more than 1 minute per year of age, etc. One thing I look for in terms of discipline is NOT forcing kids to say "I'm sorry". I absolutely hate the forced sorry. I think it's stupid, because it's totally meaningless. It's just words. The kid saying them doesn't mean it, and doesn't even necessarily know what they mean. Don't get me wrong - if the kid is actually sorry, and knows what it means to say they're sorry, and says it on their own, then I'm all for it. But that doesn't happen at age two. I just don't like the forced sorry. The discipline info doesn't say anything about this, but I've seen it happen more than once.

Jordyn started at this daycare when she was 15 months old, and there were kids both older and younger than her. Now, though, she's starting to be one of the oldest kids there, which I don't like, and frankly, it seems that enrollment is low. Maybe it's just because it's the summer, but there are definitely fewer kids than there used to be. One new kid just started, but it's been a while since another one has, and several kids are leaving or have left recently.

Despite all of this, I know Jordyn has been safe, well-cared-for, and happy, and those are the most important things. But I decided it was time to move her to a center-based program with a larger peer group and a little more structure to the day. So we started visiting places about a month ago, and I totally expected to end up on a waiting list or three, and have her end up starting somewhere next September, or maybe in the middle of the year when a space opened up. I wasn't happy about the prospect of the move being a year away, but I really didn't think I was going to have a choice.

Many of the places we visited didn't have spots available. One has one starting in January, but I didn't like the place much at all, and one she's not even eligible for until she's 2.9, which will be in May. I could have reserved her a spot there for May, but that seems pretty far out, the place wasn't very conveniently located given where we're now living, and I wasn't convinced it was the right place. My very favorite place, with big open classrooms with tons of windows and natural light, and a huge awesome playground, put us on the waiting list (with no fee) for this September but said it was very highly unlikely anything would open up. They don't even start a waiting list for next September until this September, so I have it written in my calendar to call on the specific day they start compiling a list (although I don't know that I'll put Jordyn through yet another transition in a year, plus I don't know that I'll want to switch her). Another place that has a great reputation seems good except it's in the basement of a church and there aren't many windows so while the rooms are big enough, there's not much natural light at all. I also didn't love the director. It doesn't matter, though, because they don't have space until next fall, either.

But we visited a place that I'd heard really good things about, it's conveniently located, and my gut said I was going to like. First thing when we arrived for our tour, the director asked me to remind her which days I was looking for, and when I told her, she said someone had pulled out literally the day before. There's a waiting list, but since it was a 4-day/week slot, it didn't work for anyone on the list since most people need 5 days/week or needed the one day that didn't have an opening, so it was ours if we wanted it!!!! I couldn't believe it! We totally lucked into an amazing place!!

I liked what I saw on the tour, I really liked the director, and I was just so excited. We did have one more place to see the following week, so I asked the director if she could hold the spot until then, just in case, but told her we almost definitely wanted it. She had no problem with that, but of course I called her immediately after visiting that last place, and told her we'd take it!

By the way, I specifically asked the director about their discipline policy, and she explained it to me, basically redirection, reminding kids to use gentle touch or use their words or whatever. I asked about the forced sorry, and she said they don't use it, and in fact, she specifically talks about it and directs teachers not to use it in their orientation. Yay!

Jordyn will officially start at her new school on September 3rd, but she's currently transitioning in. We've visited twice together, and she has two visits on her own coming up in the next week-and-a-half. I definitely think I'm more excited than she is! Especially since she's going through some sort of separation anxiety/sleep regression phase right now, but that's for another post. That's not to say she didn't do ok during the two visits - she really did. She kept checking in to make sure I was still there, and at times she wouldn't let me move as far away from her (still within the room) as I wanted to, but there were some times I could tell that she'll end up doing really well once she's more comfortable there.

Here are a few pictures from our visit this morning. The center is in an old converted Victorian house, which is very cool; they left some of the period detail. Some of the walls aren't as decorated as they used to be, since they're taking down old artwork, kids' birthdays, etc. since the new school year begins right after Labor Day and a lot of kids will be transitioning in and out of the room.

Dot markers with a teacher.

She's never played with our farm at home! She was the only one in the dramatic play area at the time, but she did interact with some of the other kids. 

A second turn with the dot markers, leaning over to mark on the teacher's paper, of course!

Jordyn doing puzzles with another child and a teacher on the right side, notice the big windows towards the left.

She put a soft green basket on her head (which just happened to match her shirt) and pretended it was a hat. It was so cute, too bad the picture is blurry.

We also spent a good deal of time outside on the playground, I just didn't take any pictures. They do water play outside every morning in the summer (barring significant rain, of course). And there was a "dance party" on the rug just before this last picture was taken, which was very cute. I took some video, but still can't figure out how to get videos to work on this blog. And there was circle time with books and songs, and snack time. I love how there's structure, but not too much structure, to the day.

When I posted on the town's parent listserv asking for feedback about the center before taking the spot, I heard back from several people who absolutely RAVED about how wonderful it is and how much they love it. I've since heard from a few more saying the same thing. No one seems to have anything bad to say; apparently the only negative is that there's a lot of traffic on the street where it's located. Whatever, I can deal with that!

Jordyn will be in the "Sprouts" room this year (~2 year olds), and will be in preschool next year, and then pre-K. A good thing about this center is that it starts with infants, where some only take toddler or preschoolers and up, so if I go through with my dream to have another, they could be at the same place, at least for a while. Assuming I could get a spot in the infant room, that is!

I'm very excited to see how she does in this new environment! I think she's not only going to be safe, well-cared-for, and happy, but I'll be happy too, and I think she's going to learn a lot and have a ton of fun at the same time. That is, once she through the initial transition, and gets past her current separation anxiety phase.