In Praise of Zofran

In case I haven't said this already, the first trimester blows.

I haven't actually thrown up, but I've been REALLY nauseous and just plain miserable. My stomach just "isn't right", I'm completely exhausted, I'm nauseous (did I say that yet??), I have indigestion (and I know - it only gets worse), I don't feel good, and when I'm home, I pretty much don't get off the couch. Well, except to pee.

And I have to force myself to eat, due to my complete aversion of all things food. And that in and of itself is quite upsettting. It's really a horrible thing to have to force food down your own throat because you know you need to (and it actually does help the nausea), yet you have absolutely no desire to eat. Some things are easier to get down than others (namely, matzah ball soup, that my sister made for me (along with a side of attitude) when I asked her to, and Boloco's nutella milkshake). And I eventually realized that protein really does help more than just saltines, graham crackers, pretzels, and ginger ale. But then eating just gives me indigestion, and Tums only does so much (i.e. not much).

On Monday I was literally in tears over feeling so completely crappy, and being at work at the beginning of a 12-hour shift. I finally broke down and called my midwives' office. And ended up with a prescription for Zofran (which was what I was hoping for). I'd already taken it a couple of times, since the nurses I work with can get it for me without a prescription, and it helped. So when my midwife said she was going to call in a prescription, and I clarified that she was talking about Zofran, I literally said, "I love you"! She also wanted to talk about nutritional ideas, but when I told her all I'd already been doing (i.e. eating before getting out of bed in the morning, taking my prenatals at night instead of in the morning, not letting my stomach get too empty, etc. - basically every trick in the book), all she had left to suggest was eating smoothies and milkshakes if drinking is easier to do than eating. That's when I decided to try the milkshake from Boloco, and that was great! It was good, I could eat (drink) it pretty easily, and it kept me full for a pretty long time. I have since bought the ingredients (nutella, skim milk, and vanilla nonfat frozen yogurt) to try to replicate it at home, but haven't tried yet.

Anyway... the Zofran. It's wonderful. God's gift to pregnant women with "morning" sickness (even thought it's really for people on chemo). Makes a HUGE difference in how I feel, and how much I can do.

So, I told my mom about it, as she knew how miserable I've been. Literally hours later, I get an email from her, saying she "did some research", and that her opinion is that I shouldn't take it while pregnant. I was pissed. I wrote her back, said I also did research (duh), that doctors and midwives wouldn't prescribe it if it wasn't ok, that women take it all the time when pregnant and have perfectly healthy babies, and that I was going to continue to take it as needed. I have to a) be able to function at work, b) feel like a human being, and c) eat.

I think she realized I was upset, and wrote back saying she was sorry she interfered, and that she knows I have to function at work.

I think this was probably just the first (at least with baby-related things!) of MANY, MANY times my mother will have an opinion, or make a suggestion, and I won't listen. So, she might as well get used to it!

And, I'm really trying not to take the Zofran on a regular basis. For instance, I've been at work for 12 hours (outta here in five minutes, yay!) and haven't taken it at all today.

I had absolutely no idea how sick I'd be/feel. I was completely unprepared for this, somehow. But now that I have the Zofran, I feel like it's my lifeline - there if I need it. So I can relax a little.