Meet the Midwives

Well, what did I THINK would happen? I guess I didn't really think it through. Tonight I went to a "Meet the Midwives" event for a local midwifery practice. On their website, it lists IUIs as one of their services. So, I figured I'd find out something about that, because it would be nice to stay with one doctor/practice from conception through birth. I have some interest in using a midwife as opposed to an OB, so I thought this would be a good idea...

So, I'm pretty sure there were 8 thousand couples there - pretty much all of them pregnant - and me. Little ol', single, alone, not-even-TTC-yet me. I felt so out of place. And, ok, I admit... it made me lonely. And a little sad to not have a husband there with me. Does this mean I'm not finished grieving the loss of doing this in the more traditional way - with a partner? I don't know. Maybe. But I don't think so. I think it's ok (normal?) to still feel a little lonely and sad about it, even though I've come to terms with it. Does that make any sense?

And the IUIs weren't mentioned AT ALL. I asked one of the midwives about it at the end, and she said, yes, they do them, told me at which office (they work out of several, but all deliver at one hospital), and which midwife runs the program. She said it's a "social program", as opposed to an infertility clinic - they work mostly with lesbian couples and single women (aha!), and that they do simple unmedicated IUIs. If you need anything more than that they'll refer you to an RE or an infertility clinic. That much I pretty much knew already from the website. So, after a tour of the birthing center (labor and delivery unit in the hospital) and an hour-and-a-half sitting in an auditorium with all the couples listening to them ask questions about prenatal care and birthing using a midwife, that's what I got that was useful and relevant to me.

Don't get me wrong. It was all actually very interesting, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to choose to work with this practice once I'm pregnant, wherever I happen to end up getting pregnant. I like that it's certified nurse midwives, that you give birth in the hospital where OBs are available to help at a moment's notice if there are any complications, and that it's very holistic and open to various types of laboring, etc. It's nice that the midwives and the OBs work seamlessly together and share the space in the hospital. I like the midwife philosophy of getting to know you during your prenatal care and spending a lot of time with you during labor (as much or as little as you want), instead of the doctor who's just focused on the medical piece and that's it.

I WAS very impressed with the practice and the birthing center, and I found all the questions and answers pretty interesting. And the midwives themselves all seemed very friendly, personable, and down-to-earth. But it was just that the ENTIRE focus was on prenatal care and labor and delivery, and nothing whatsoever about the IUI part of things was even mentioned, until I asked at the end (I don't know why I assumed that just because it was listed under "services" on the website that it would be discussed to some degree at the "meet the midwives" session). And that the room was full of pregnant couples, so I felt lonely, out of place, and kind of like I didn't belong (at least not yet, as I'm not even TTC yet).

The good news? An IUI there only costs $190! Plus the cost of sperm, of course.

I made an appointment with an RE this morning, but it's not until October 6th. I was really hoping not to have to wait that long - I want to do my CD3 tests at the beginning of my next cycle, and it'll be too late by then. Oh, well. I don't plan to start TTC until January, so I guess there's really not such a rush. Of course when I told the midwife tonight that I was going to see an RE to ask about testing, she said she didn't think I'd need testing unless I didn't get pregnant with several unmedicated IUIs first. I have an OB appointment on the 28th, which should be at the beginning of the cycle, so maybe she can order the bloodwork... To see or not to see an RE, that is the question!